So I was applying aimlessly for a "real job" this evening, when I realized that everything is shit. Everything.
Starting with my physical resume, to my qualifications, to the fact that I have received one or two callbacks for the hundred resumes I have supplied...
So, in true Michelle Charles form, I put my computer aside, scalded myself with shower water, contemplated cutting off my hair and making a fast break for California, leaving student loans, credit card debt, my apartment, my clothes, my furniture, my dwindling Chase Student Checking Account, everything, behind. Except my dog.
So I guess that's where this starts. Not with the debt or the lifefail, but the fact that when I contemplate leaving everything, the one thing that comes with me is my dog. I guess that about sums up my thoughts on my life at the moment...
The problem with this is I'd rather not let my debt fall on my family. They've been good to me, more or less, and I'd be horrified to ruin their lives with my fail.
I graduated Ohio State University with a decent-ish GPA. Two majors. Nothing exciting to set me apart from the other 70,000 students. But still, I expected it to bring me further than it has.
Which brings me to the current employment. West. West. Oh God, how much you suck, West. More on that in another entry, I'd imagine. After all, this would lose its "introduction" status should I get into all the fabulously horrifying descriptions of this current job. One thing that I will mention is this: my income < my bills.
As to the point of this blog? I suppose I needed someone to rant to. I suppose I needed a way to stay sane on this Saturday night, while I sit here in a towel and listen to Train (yes, TRAIN)... I suppose I need to convince myself that either:
a: I'm not the only post grad failing so hard or
b: That at least my fail can make someone else feel like they are failing less.
... the c option is that no one will read this so it is all irrelevant. Also entirely possible.
This, though, friends, is an unbeta'd, unproofed, unreread hot mess of an intro that is in no conceptual order and it just me ranting and I guess... starting a blog.
I have a tendency not to finish the things I start. We'll see how this goes.
